How to CHANGE PERSONALITY

The change in some personality trait may be motivated by different needs, but is this possible? Can an aggressive person become peaceful; daring instead of timorous; open instead of reserved; kind rather than ruthless, etc.?

In this Psychology-Online article we will see if you can change your personality and how to do it.

Index

1. Can the personality be changed?
2. How to change your personality
3. The importance of the environment in the change of personality
4. Changing the personality is not immediate

Can a person change his personality traits? To face this question, it is necessary to focus attention on the factors indicated as constituents of the personality: the biological and psychological structure, this is to distinguish between "what I am" (my potential capacities) and how this I manifests itself in relationships with the environment (my character), since it allows us to elucidate what I can change. However, the environmental factor must also be taken into account since personality traits manifest in response to environmental stimuli.

As you can read in the following article about the formation and composition of the personality, the innate predispositions and tendencies towards certain behaviors are fixed by the biological structure of the person, which is marked by his genome, therefore, it will not be possible to change them Unless this structure or its functions are modified (for example, suffering a brain tumor or trauma, as the well-known case of Phileas Gage). In these cases there is a radical change in personality.

Instead, yes it is possible to modify the expression of the traits although innate predispositions remain unchanged. Since traits are manifested through acts that are the consequence of thoughts, feelings and motivations, if changes the way of thinking, feeling or acting and this change is maintained over time, so will the expression of traits. In this regard, it has been shown that traumatic events involve a drastic change in the personal sphere and can affect the psychological structure (bereavement, aggression, separation, unemployment, serious illness, abandonment, etc.) producing modifications in the composition of the set of personality traits (some traits disappear and / or others appear new).

It is observed, for example, that an initially peaceful and tolerant person can become aggressive, distrustful and intolerant after having suffered a traumatic physical aggression. In physiological terms it can be said that we cannot change the structure of the neural networks established during the stages of development of the person (the connectome), but we can we can modify the way we process information that passes through them, adding new neural connections and deactivating others. For this reason, the personality changes throughout life, it is shaped by lived experiences and learning.

The procedure that we can use to eliminate an inappropriate trait and replace it with another is to modify the instructions of the mental program that generates it to introduce changes in the way of thinking, in the moral values ​​and in the motivations. It would be about modifying the "source code" used to build said program (knowledge, beliefs, values, traditions, social norms, etc.) in order to fix and consolidate the trait wanted. For this work it is required that the psychological resources of the person provide a good level of competence in the following faculties:

• Intelligence to understand one's own reality and that of the environment and mental flexibility to admit that there are other ways of seeing reality and to be willing to study them.
• Capacity ofregulationAnd control of emotions and impulses to adapt their expression according to the circumstances. Here you will find more information about the self-control and techniques to practice it.
• Motivation to generate satisfactory life expectations based on the new traits and carry out the changes required to do so.

In addition to these faculties, an important factor to favor the modification of a trait is to pay attention to the environment in which our life takes place (family, social, work and cultural). Interested in relating to environments that facilitate change, that is, that they suppose a positive reinforcement for the trait that you want to consolidate, or a negative reinforcement if what you want is to eliminate it. For example, an initially shy and distrustful person can “deactivate” this trait if they live with optimistic and determined people. and learns to behave in a spirited and determined way, which will gradually transfer the trait from introversion to extroversion; Similarly, a person with a tendency to aggressive responses will not manifest this behavior if he manages to avoid the hostile environment that encourages him to do so.

In this regard, it would be useful to find out what kind of environmental stimuli (so-called "environmental markers") are those that cause the manifestation of the unwanted trait for avoiding them, for example, a stressful situation, a difficult interpersonal relationship, a family environment conflictive, etc.; and in the opposite direction, look for those that motivate the desired behavior: stimulating challenges and creative initiatives that encourage self realisation and the self-esteem, social work, search for new experiences, etc.

Finally, highlight that changing your personality voluntarily is not an easy task, especially in the features in which the emotional system that by depending on autonomic nervous system it makes its control very difficult.

In addition, some people are often reluctant to change it, either because they do not know themselves and do not accept the negative traits that others attribute to them, or because the traits have become consolidated so much that this would mean losing their identity, it would be like losing their Self, ceasing to be who they think they are (usually happens when this change is essential for success in the couples therapy).

This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

If you want to read more articles similar to How to change your personality, we recommend that you enter our category of Personality.

• Buss, A. H. & Plomin, R. (1984). Temperament: Early Developing Personality Traits. Hillsdale, N. J.: Erlbaum.
• Eysenck, H. (1970). Biological bases of personality. Barcelona. Fontanella
• Gray, J. TO. (1970). The psychophysiological basis of introversion-extraversion. Behavior Research and Therapy.
• McCrae, R. and Costa, P (2003) Personality in Adulthood: A Five-factor Theory Perspective. Guilford Press.