How to OVERCOME Emotional Dependence

  • Jul 26, 2021
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How to overcome emotional dependence on your partner

Emotional dependence on the partner, contrary to what is usually thought, is not always negative. The human being, by nature, needs to bond in an affective way with another person as a means of subsistence. The first person with whom he develops this bond of emotional dependence is the caregiver he has had since birth, usually the father, the mother or both. When we are adults, we look for that affective bond in a couple relationship And depending on how healthy the bond with the attachment figures has been in childhood, it will be the one we have with the partner in adulthood. But, how to know when that emotional dependence towards the partner is negative? To what extent does it cease to be a healthy dependence? Surely if you are wondering how to overcome emotional dependence with your partner, it is because you have the feeling of that something is wrong with you and you have even realized that this dependency that you feel is currently affecting your relationship.

In this Psychology-Online article, we are going to let you know to what extent emotional dependence towards another person is healthy and finally we will give you some tips so that you can know

how to overcome emotional dependence on your partner.

How to overcome emotional dependence? To start you need to know what is healthy emotional dependence like that you can feel towards your partner and that it should not generate any kind of concern, for this you We will briefly explain what are the characteristics that a person possesses with this type of dependence.

  • People with a healthy emotional dependence want bond closely and intimately with others, however, they are not overly sensitive to rejection and abandonment.
  • They know enjoy a relationship as a couple without worrying all the time if they will be abandoned, betrayed or rejected.
  • They seek not only their well-being or that of their partner, but that both are comfortable and satisfied within the relationship.
  • They know express your needs, wishes and feelings to the other person without having to submit to repression and they never negotiate intimacy with the other, it is simply taken for granted.
  • Another characteristic of people with healthy emotional dependence is that despite feeling dependent on their partner and knowing that their partner is also dependent on them, they feel free to develop, to enjoy life and to act according to your personal values ​​without having to feel sacrificed at some point.
How to overcome emotional dependence on your partner - Emotional dependence on your partner

To know when the emotional dependence on the partner it goes from being healthy to negative or pathological, it is necessary to detect some symptoms that make it evident. Between the main symptoms of a person who is experiencing this type of dependency, the following are found:

  • Live constantly worried that your partner will abandon you, betray or reject you.
  • Invest most of your day in thoughts related to your relationship with your partner. the fear That causes you that it may end at some point, even if everything seems to be going well.
  • Feeling uneasy when you are away from your partner
  • Put aside your family and friends for being only with a partner
  • Allow your happiness to depend solely and exclusively on your relationship with your partner
  • Want to be all the time with your partner and not give your space or give it to yourself either
  • Thinking that if your partner leaves you your life would be meaningless
  • When your emotional state depends on how your partner behaves with you. So if sometimes he behaves indifferent, sometimes affectionate, sometimes bad, etc. you live with constants emotional ups and downs.
  • You don't let your partner see their family and / or friends, you just want me to be with you.
  • You put aside your personal goals and interests to please him or simply to have more time with that person.

It is very important to know that if you have experienced these symptoms you should eliminate emotional dependence, for the good of the couple and the emotional stability of both. Here we explain how to overcome emotional dependence with your partner.

How to overcome emotional dependence on your partner - Emotional dependence: symptoms

If you are not sure if you are emotionally dependent on your partner, we recommend doing this emotional dependence test. The questions will help you reflect on the relationship and your behavior. In addition, the test offers immediate results in which an orientation will appear based on your answers.

How to stop being emotionally dependent? Once we have detected that we have a strong emotional dependence, it is normal for you to ask us about the treatment of emotional dependence or its solutions. Well, it's time to get tools and solutions to know how to overcome emotional dependence with your partner. Next, we show you 4 keys to overcome emotional dependence after a breakup, from your former partner or your current partner.

  1. Acknowledge that you have a problem. The first step to begin to heal is to recognize that we have a problem. So it is necessary that you identify and accept that the type of emotional dependence you have towards your partner, (if it is) is negative and I feel detrimental to you and to your relationship partner.
  2. Identify how emotional dependence is harming you. Reflect on the way in which being negatively dependent on your partner is hurting yourself. Also reflect on how it is hurting your relationship. You have to be totally aware, not only that you are dependent but how being dependent has affected you and can affect you more and more in your personal life and in all your relationships. Being mindful will give you enough motivation so that you can start a change.
  3. Work on increasing your self-esteem. People who are dependent on others in a negative way have not learned to love themselves enough and to give themselves the value they deserve. All people should feel loved, respected and valued by ourselves because only in this way will another person be able to do the same with us. A person with a High self-steem It is difficult to develop a pathological emotional dependence on another. So if you would like to work to increase your self-esteem, one of the ways in which you can achieve it is to go to a professional to serve as a guide and also help you achieve it.
  4. Take time for yourself. Invest time in your favorite goals, hobbies, and hobbies. It is necessary that you also give priority to spending time with yourself and do not leave aside what you are passionate about since it is another of the things that give meaning to our life. By doing so you will learn to be alone but above all to enjoy it and not feel helpless or anxious about not meeting your partner.

This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

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