It is no secret that one of the most important parts of our life is the social relationships. In each of the things we do there is a component of relationships with others that largely determines (facilitating or hindering) our search for happiness. It is a common belief that the friendliness and social attractiveness of some people is innate. However, it is clear that it is something that is acquired through experiences that are modeling them until they become experts in these skills.
Rarely in our lives are we going to be able to escape the effects of social relationships, whether in our workplace, school, our leisure time or within our own family. A pleasant interaction in any of these areas makes us feel happy, performing our tasks more effectively. In fact, low competition in relationships with others can lead to failure at work, school, or in the family. See an example in the image.
A good social skills they will be useful to us on many occasions:
- How do we get into a new group of friends?
- How to establish a suitable relationship with our teenage children?
- How do you say no without making the relationship feel damaged?
- How to act correctly before a job interview?
According to Caballo (1986): "Socially skilled behavior is that set of behaviors emitted by an individual in an interpersonal context that expresses the feelings, attitudes, wishes, opinions or rights of that individual in a way appropriate to the situation, respecting those behaviors in others, and which generally solves the immediate problems of the situation while minimizing the likelihood of future problems."
From here we can get several ideas of great interest for daily life:
- Interpersonal context: You have to examine the context, with whom, when how skillful responses are issued.
- Respecting the behaviors of others: It is as skillful to express a compliment as to accept it properly. The way we react to the behaviors of others always has its consequences.
- Solve and minimize problems: Social skills are goal oriented. These objectives can be of several types:
- Material objectives - Effectiveness of objectives (eg getting our salary raised)
- Objectives of maintaining or improving the relationship - Effectiveness of the relationship (eg not having a conflict with the boss)
- Objective of maintaining self-esteem - Effectiveness in respecting oneself (eg not feeling inferior if we are not granted it or criticized for it).
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
