Some people have more difficulties and mental barriers in speaking or relating to others. Shyness is a personality trait that is often accompanied by fears and insecurities, a shy person usually enjoys their own company and plunges into their inner world to feel more comfortable. However, on some occasions, the fact that it is difficult for us to establish social ties or speak in public can become a problem that must be solved immediately. For this, it is important to learn the best strategies to know how to overcome shyness and insecurity.
Are you a shy person and are you looking for strategies to break this barrier that prevents you from relating to others? Discover the best tricks and techniques in this Psychology-Online article.
The shyness in psychology It is defined as a trait of our personality, this implies that it is an intrinsic tendency in our way of being and acting. Personality traits can be mold and adapt to our environmentHowever, it is extremely unlikely that an introvert will suddenly become an extrovert and highly sociable.
Being shy is not something categorically bad, but it can generate adaptation and relationship difficulties if social skills are not worked on. We can put our efforts to adapt better and lead a life far from the fear that social relationships can cause us.
Know your strengths and weaknesses
To know how to overcome shyness and insecurity, first of all, it is important to do an exercise of personal self-knowledge to identify what we must improve and what are our best tools. Knowing our weaknesses does not make us more vulnerable, on the contrary, thanks to this exercise we can know exactly what attitudes we will have to change to overcome shyness.
Trust yourself and don't compare yourself
Many times, shyness arises from the fear of feeling inferior to others, we may not speak for fear of saying something wrong or uncomfortable. Trust yourselfYou sure have a lot to contribute to the conversation. Nor is it very appropriate to compare yourself with other people, each individual has their own way of behaving and relating to others, maybe a outgoing person has an easier time starting a conversation, however, this fact does not mean that he is a better person than someone introvert.
Pursue small goals
For such an important change in behavior, it is advisable to establish realistic goals and in the short term. Taking small steps will raise our self-esteem and we will see that, indeed, we are able to get out of our bubble of shyness and introversion. We can try going to social gatherings with a small number of people, trying to start a conversation with an acquaintance, going to a friend's party ...
Shyness is usually accompanied by many characteristics and behaviors characteristic of it, among them we can highlight the Scared of speaking in public. This fear is characterized by a feeling of nervousness and anxiety when doing some kind of public intervention out loud. The fear of public speaking can be caused by low self-esteem, anticipatory anxiety, social phobia, or a extreme shyness.
Psychological therapy
Fortunately, there are many treatments to overcome shyness and fear of speaking. The cognitive behavioral therapy it is usually very indicated to cure this problem. Treatment will be based on the following points:
- Assessment of the situation.
- Search for other psychological problems that interact with fear.
- Training in social skills.
- Practice for starting and holding conversations.
- Facing criticism.
- Public speaking practice.
- Monitoring and evaluation of therapy.
Tips and Tricks to Lose Shame
Along with cognitive-behavioral therapy, we can practice the following tricks at home, these can help us overcome everyday situations that generate fear and insecurity:
- Manage anxiety by relaxation techniques (meditation, breathing, mindfulness).
- Launch the positive thinking to fight fear.
- Do exercises to strengthen self-esteem and self-confidence.
- Practice in front of a mirror your communicative skills.
- In the case of having to make a presentation in public, relax a few minutes before and do not obsessively practice the speech.
It is important to remember that shyness itself is not an inherently negative characteristic, diversity in personalities make human beings an incredible and highly varied species in terms of their behavior. However, when a personality trait prevents you from leading a normal life it is time to start treating it, then we offer you the following exercises to know how to overcome shyness and insecurity:
- Trust your abilities to communicate: if we don't even trust and assert ourselves, no one will. Self love and boosting self-esteem is the first step in fighting fear and shyness.
- Support your personality: don't force yourself to be someone else, admit your shyness and work your communication skills through it. Do you want to know how to stop being shy? First of all, you will have to accept yourself and observe your personality tendencies.
- Practice assertive communication: This is based on expressing and defending our emotions without fear but in a calm and non-aggressive way.
- Learn to accept compliments: a shy person has great difficulty accepting compliments and responding to them with a simple "thank you." When someone you trust tells you how well you do something or how handsome you are today, accept what they tell you, allow yourself to believe that someone is telling you something positive. Accepting pleasant comments from people we trust can help us improve the image we project towards others.
- Try to make a new friendship: Introversion can lead to isolation and, in turn, lead to even more shyness. You can try to overcome shyness by stepping out of your comfort zone and establishing a new personal bond with someone.
If after many attempts, you do not see yourself able to overcome your shyness, you can consult a specialist so that he can accompany you in the process. Take your time and look at the small achievements that you are getting along the way. Remember that changing a personality trait is not easy, it takes time and patience.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
