How to overcome the FEAR of DEATH

  • Jul 26, 2021
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How to overcome the fear of death

Death is part of the life cycle of every living being, however, it continues to be a taboo subject in our society, becoming one of the most frightening events for the vast majority of people. Feeling a certain fear of death is natural, death supposes finitude and our whole life is reduced to finding a meaning in our life, a meaning of our existence.

However, when this fear invades your life and produces elevated feelings of anxiety, it is possible that we are facing a death-phobic disorder, thanatophobia, which affects 2% of the population.

Talking about death generates a feeling of discomfort and therefore has become a social taboo, but yes You want to transcend this cultural connotation, keep reading this Psychology-Online article where we will talk from how to overcome the fear of death.

You may also like: How to get over the death of a child

Index

  1. Why am I afraid of death?
  2. Thanatophobia
  3. How to overcome the fear of death
  4. How to overcome the fear of the death of a family member

Why am I afraid of death?

The human being is the only living being that has the capacity for abstraction, that is, it has the ability to become aware that throughout the life cycle a time line is established that has a beginning and an end. This temporality gives off a set of emotions, directed at fear about an uncertain future, which can end up triggering a phobic disorder: thanatophobia. The self-consciousness of the human being allows him to elaborate questions that mark his existence, such as: what is the meaning of my life; Where do I come from; where am I going??? Which are born in the face of the awareness that life has an end. This end is unknown and we do not have control over it, which generates a high anxiety and fear.

Faced with these fears that the idea of ​​ceasing to exist gives off, Western culture has developed a image of death as something to be afraid of, difficult to accept and therefore something to be avoid. The consequence of this taboo has been the non-acceptance of death and this avoidance causes people to be increasingly vulnerable to this event.

The emotions that death arouses, as well as the thoughts associated with it, are different based on different factors, one of them: age. Young people or young adults perceive the end of their existence as an event far away and therefore, they understand that they do not have the need to face it and therefore do not reflect on is. In old age, an increase in acceptance is seen, which makes it become a lesser threat to the person, generating less anxiety. Therefore, they tend to be young people and middle-aged adults, who face the denial of this reality and the social taboo they have become, they are the ones who have the most problems accepting the end of the life cycle.

Therefore, the lack of acceptance of death that has arisen as a consequence of being a social taboo, produces anxious thoughts and feelings which translate to fear of dying or thanatophobia.

Thanatophobia

Being afraid of dying is a natural fact caused by the factors mentioned previously and very common in our culture, however when it is fear invades a person's life and is a generator of high anxiety, which can lead to the appearance of panic attacks, we are talking of the thanatophobia, the phobia of death.

What is thanatophobia? Thanatophobia is the fear of dying. It is described as an irrational and persistent fear of death and of everything that can surround it and with which it can be related (funerals, hospitals, coffins, ...).

Thanatophobia: symptoms

This irrational fear can trigger a set of symptoms, which also appear in other phobic disorders, such as:

  • Anxiety
  • Obsessive thoughts in the face of one's own death
  • Avoidance behaviors
  • Anxious or depressed mood
  • Anguish
  • Panic crisis or panic crisis
  • Insomnia

This fear can have great consequences in the life of the person, limiting your daily life and in the most drastic cases, it prevents the person from stopping their daily activities and staying at home for fear of facing the possibility of dying.

How to overcome the fear of death - Thanatophobia

How to overcome the fear of death.

Here are 4 strategies to overcome the fear of death:

1. Acceptance of death

The first indispensable factor to get rid of the fear of dying is the acceptance that all life has an end. We live immersed in a culture that eagerly seeks to delay the inevitable, thereby turning death into an abnormal factor, a misfortune. We live closing our eyes to death, as if our life were eternal and this attitude is related to the consciousness we have in the face of death, an empty consciousness. We must accept the inevitable and with its acceptance we will stop being afraid of the unknown, we must stop seeking control before it, since that it is inevitable and with it we will reduce the feelings of anxiety and uncertainty that the fear of To die.

2. Live fully

Acceptance of death helps us enjoy more of our passage through life, helps us appreciate what we have. It is for this reason that people live looking for a meaning, it is the same end that leads to seek a meaning in our lives, to think about what it is we want to leave ourselves in this world and to savor every day Like it's the last, that's how we should live

3. Acceptance of your life

When the time comes, many people fear ceasing to exist, because when they look back they see that their life was not as they had hoped. We cannot live anchored in the mistakes made in the past or in what we would have liked to be different. Your life is all your achievements and all your mistakes and all this has led you to be who you are, do not waste your life thinking about how you could have done it differently, accept any vital circumstances Let it appear, accept your life experience because it is yours, so the first step in overcoming the fear of death is to accept it as such and accept your life.

4. Triggers

It may be that the fear of death has been revealed because of one or more triggers, such as some traumatic event, like the death of a loved one. If the fear of death is the result of a cause, overcoming this fear should focus on getting rid of that event. If you find the trigger for your fear, it will be easier to cope with the fear of death.

Thanatophobia: treatment

When we talk about death phobia, the treatment is different. To overcome thanatophobia requires, as in any phobic disorder, a treatment of a therapeutic nature and, if appropriate, psychopharmacological.

For this, the treatment that has been most effective is the cognitive behavioral therapy. This therapy focuses on a set of techniques:

  1. Restructuring of thoughts: this technique has the objective of converting those thoughts associated with the fear of death that are negative, irrational and harmful, in thoughts more appropriate to reality and healthy.
  2. Relaxation techniques: the relaxation techniques They allow the person to lower the high levels of anxiety and stress generated by the fear of dying.
  3. Exposition: the exposure technique can be complex in the face of thanatophobia, its objective must be to accustom the person to their fear, in this case, to the fear of death.

How to overcome the fear of the death of a family member.

  1. Normalize. On many occasions the fear of death is not concentrated in oneself, but in the death of a loved one, of an attachment figure. Being afraid of losing a loved one It is normalHowever, when this thought appears constantly, it can be highly emotionally charged and the appearance of many anxiety symptoms.
  2. Validate. It is important validate these feelings. It is normal to feel a certain fear of the possibility of a loss of a loved one, but what is not healthy is to let these feelings invade your life.
  3. To accept. Just as it is important to accept the death of oneself in order to overcome it, in the face of the death of a loved one, acceptance is the most important element. By accepting the loss, it becomes easier to cope and show greater resilience before her. It is important to understand that it is part of the life cycle and the course of life and that it is a fact that we will all have to face one day.
  4. Work self-esteem. On the other hand, it is important increase your self-esteem and independence, it is normal to suffer before the loss of a loved one, but to come to think that without that person your life would stop make sense or that you will not be able to live the same way without that person, magnifies the fear that this person may leave. Dependence on an attachment figure triggers greater vulnerability to its loss, which is why it is important to promote self-esteem and independence to cope.
  5. Manage emotions. Finally, it should be noted that we should not focus on those elements that we cannot control. We cannot control that the death of that loved one does not come, but we can decide how we want to spend our life with that person. Focus on what you can do, on how you can help him today and how you want to spend time with that dear person. You can also control how you want to experience this situation, focus your attention on cope with fear and sadness in a healthy way, in learning to calm down and reduce anxiety and in knowing express and share your emotions and feelings with the dear people around you.

This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

If you want to read more articles similar to How to overcome the fear of death, we recommend that you enter our category of Clinical psychology.

Bibliography

  • Borda, M., Pérez, A & Avargues, M. (2011). Cognitive-behavioral treatment in a case of death phobia. Analysis and Behavior Modification, 37, 91-114.
  • Christoph, J. (2015). Don't be afraid to die: how to overcome the fear of death. New York: Plow Publishing House.
  • Martí, C. (2014). Fear of dying: experimental study of the repercussions of anguish in the face of death in the young population; applications in end-of-life processes (Doctoral Thesis). University of Granada, Granada.
  • Sanchís, L. (2017). Coping with the fear of death (Doctoral Thesis). Complutense University of Madrid, Madrid.
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