My CHILD wants to know WHO HIS FATHER is, what do I do?

  • Jul 26, 2021
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My son wants to know who his father is, what do I do?

To this day, social relationships and, specifically, those of a couple have changed a lot, being currently very different from those of a few years ago. This means that the family members are no longer the same as before, such as the father and the mother, but They can be couples of the same gender, families formed by a single parent, by the new partner of the father or mother, etc.

In any case, we also find situations in which, within the family, there is an absent parent or who does not take care of the children. If this situation occurs, for children it can be difficult to process and manage, however, for the mother, if It is the case that it is the father who was absent and did not want to take charge, this can also be very complex done. In this Psychology-Online article, we propose what to do if your child wants to know who their father is. We will inform you about how to tell your child who her real father is, what to do if she does not want to be a father and why she abandoned you.

It is very important that the child knows who her biological father is, even if he does not want to act as a father. The minor has the right to know this information to avoid confusion, insecurities and so that you get to know his roots and his history.

However, the amount of information and details may vary depending on the age of the child, since the older the child, the greater the ability to understand the situation and why. It is even more important to explain to her who her real father is, if there is a person who practices as such, such as the mother's partner since, in this way, we would avoid questions and grow up with an idea of ​​her past wrong. But, how do you explain to your son that you are a single mother? How to tell a child that her father is not her father? Later we will see how to communicate it.

First of all, you have to keep calmToday, there are many women who raise their children alone and they do it wonderfully well, but this is probably a more difficult task to manage individually than collectively. Remember that there are many Types of family and they are all just as normal and valid.

  • If at times you feel exhausted both physically and mentally, if you feel lonely or feel pain because of this situation, identify what you feel and where these feelings come from.
  • Allow yourself to feel but, above all, let these thoughts and this pain pass, work with the guilty thoughts that may appear since, not only will they bring you even more damage and pain.
  • To do a recovery process you must also focus on your self-esteemLoving you, valuing yourself and giving yourself time for yourself, to heal and to improve is very important and necessary to overcome and face this situation in the best possible way.

As we have mentioned before, this information has to be communicated with great sensitivity and taking into account the age of the child, if we are talking with young children, the information will have to be transmitted in the most clear as possible, but leaving aside some details that are not prepared to understand or assimilate.

How to tell a child that her father is not her father? Little by little, you have to gradually add more information about your father's previous life so that you can get a general idea of ​​what happened and what happened. who is his biological father.

We have to avoid speaking with derogatory connotations of her father since it will only lead to the son / daughter forming a bad image of him. We have to leave behind our opinions and thoughts about him so as not to harm or influence those of our children.

This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

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