Have you ever wondered if there is love at first sight? The answer is NO but always if we start from the perspective that the line of The feeling rises gradually, that is, in a relationship with a partner, falling in love is prior to love. Falling in love shows a state of idealization of the other person that is seen from a perspective of perfection. Love at first sight receives the name of crush And a crush can be as short-lived as its initial impact.
Remember Mario Benedetti's message: "It's almost law, eternal loves are the shortest." There is attraction at first sight, an attraction that over time and gradually can lead to a love story. However, affirming that there is love at first sight supposes contributing to the prolongation of so many romantic topics that should be banished from the collective imagination. Romantic topics very present in film comedies that paint an unrealistic image of love.
Index
- Romantic crush, the real thing
- The crush is born from the idealization
- Look for the balance of reason and heart
Romantic crush, the real thing.
Love at first sight does exist in the form of a crushHowever, special care should be taken not to give an absolute value to this subjective experience because many times it happens that when the protagonists know each other a little more, they lose mutual interest. Love at first sight is that positive first impression that one person produces in another leaving an emotional imprint, a crossing of glances that is implicit in that love at first sight since at this stage of the romance body language is very significant.
This type of love exists if it is contextualized in its framework of reality. That is, if this feeling does not become a solid base to make promises for the future. In reality, this feeling is manifested through the sentimental impact that a person experiences from a chance encounter with someone who is perceived as special. It is a crush and as such, this stage is marked by illusion and expectations, not by love itself that is nourished by certainties.
The crush is born from idealization.
Love at first sight is a cliché that feeds the essence of romantic comedies where the protagonists meet at a point in their destiny and know that this love will last forever. Life is much more complex than this limited scheme of love more centered on idealization than on the reality of interpersonal knowledge. When a person feels a crush, he doesn't really know what the other person is like.
He does not know his concerns, his values, his personality, his illusions, his lifestyle, his future plans... Then it can happen that when you get to know that person better, all these ingredients do coincide with previous expectations, but the opposite can also happen. Remember this message from Alfred Adler: "Follow your heart but take your brain with you."
Find the balance of reason and heart.
It is convenient to apply this message in a moment of love precisely because the impact of the emotion can be so strong that the person listens less to the rational part of it when it is in this stage. What are the symptoms of a crush? One of the clearest is that you cannot stop thinking about that someone who seems to have come into your life to change it completely. Love is not only feeling, it is also knowledge. If love at first sight existed in the literal sense of the word, two people wouldn't need to date to get to know each other better.
The adolescence and early youth they may be more marked by this type of emotional experience. However, the experience of life brings the prudence of knowing that love is very complex and that people are often not what they seem at first glance. Reason more than enough to put the crush in context.
Therefore there is NO love at first sight. But there are beautiful love stories with beginnings that are too. But the heart needs its times, that is, it has its own rhythm to progress gradually in a story. Very often, as a result of that initial impact of the moment, people make promises for the future that later they regret it because there comes a time when they realize that they have not expressed those messages from realism.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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