Arguments are part of love and relationships, however, the risk of these differences of criterion is that they can become emotional walls that produce distancing when they are not accompanied by a reconciliation. The discussions are not negative in a general way, in fact, at this time you also know reactions of yourself that you do not experience in moments of routine and discover your partner from this perspective.
How to reconcile with your partner after a fight? In Psychology-Online, we give you the keys to solve these conflicts by strengthening the relationship based on what happened.
These tips from emotional intelligence they can help you better manage the situation.
1. Pause
A gesture of emotional intelligence in discussions is knowing how to stop the conversation when the dialogue takes on an unconstructive tone or the two enter into a loop of repeated ideas. Through this pause, you can disconnect from negativity of the situation to reinterpret it from a more rational point of view. That doesn't mean you have to take several days to reflect. In most cases, it is sufficient to distract your attention from the subject for a little while. You can go out for a walk and run some errands.
2. Take the initiative in reconciliation
If the reason you do not approach your partner is because you expect him / her to take the first step, then put aside this type of excuse and take the initiative of the meeting. You can apologize if you think you have made a mistake about something, for example, in the way you present an idea or in some words that you would have preferred not to say. It is very possible that by fostering this climate of trust and rectification, your partner will also take advantage of the opportunity to do the same.
This is a time to prioritize what's important over what's minor in the relationship.
3. The power of a hug
Language transcends words. At a time when you may not know very well what to say to facilitate this approach, if pride weighs on you, a gesture as simple but therapeutic as a hug can help you connect with your partner in a intimacy bond. Hugs reduce distances, release the ego chain and promote the search for the common good.
4. Conflict resolution protocol
You may negotiate with your partner some basic principles of action in a conflict situation so that between the two of you can manage this type of situation based on principles that you have established yourself. If you both collaborate in the application of this practical guide, it is very possible that you will internalize it through experience.
5. Improve your attitude
A common mistake in a couple's discussion is that each one puts his critical gaze on the other's behavior, without However, to promote reconciliation, it is recommended that each one increase introspection to gain in assertiveness. For example, increase your level of active listening to attend without judging what your partner tells you even if it breaks your own criteria.
To improve your attitude, avoid adopting the "I'm right, you're wrong" scheme. There is no single reality around the subject of discussion. Both points of view are complementary. Therefore, if you really want to know the reality of others, you have to listen.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
