Overcoming a disappointment is a painful and long process that passes, like any process, through different phases through which we move from the pain to the acceptance of the situation, integration of the experience and reconstruction and search for the solution positive.
Disappointment occurs when, faced with a certain situation, something happens that we do not expect or want. In the following Psychology-Online article, we will tell you how to get over disappointment with a series of tips that will help you face any situation in your life and move on. Above all, it will be important to accept the situation, not create expectations and practice emotional self-management.
Index
- How disappointment is managed
- accept the situation
- Be aware of the danger of having expectations
- Practice positive emotional self-management
- Accept that not everything is in our hands
- Learn to respect the decisions of others
- Learn from negative experience
- Live pure and authentic as children do
How is disappointment handled?
disappointment is a disappointment that frustrates the expectations we had regarding a specific situation. The painful consequence of this disappointment is that we close our hearts and remain hurt or sad, with the negative effects that this has on our physical, emotional and psychological health.
On occasions when our frustrating behavior is directed outward, we will likewise provoke pain in third parties, whether they are the ones that caused our disappointment or others in which we unload our pain.
For all these reasons, to avoid all the damage that we can cause to ourselves or to others as a result of disappointment, it will be essential that we get down to work to heal this wound and, with it, avoid the negative consequences that their emotional mismanagement can cause.
Accept the situation.
Living a disappointment constitutes a greater or lesser wound that closes our hearts, which makes us unable to analyze the situation with sobriety. Disappointment arises as a result of an inconsistency between what happens and what we expected to happen in a given situation. This experience makes it difficult for us, in principle, to accept what happened and overcome it.
Thus, as occurs with other painful processes, one of the ways to overcome a disappointment is to accept the situation and go through a necessary duel for not meeting our expectations. In this article you will find information on what are the phases of grief. Later, if the process happens in a constructive way, this will lead us to accept the unwanted situation.
Be aware of the danger of having expectations.
Once we accept what has happened, we recover, in part, control of the situation, so we can analyze more objectively what happened. At this time, to overcome disappointment, it will be important to be aware of the danger of creating certain expectations with respect to the situations of our life or with respect to the people who are part of they.
The danger of generating these expectations, almost always unconsciously, lies in the fact that they enslave us, ourselves and all those involved, to the fulfillment of the themselves. The objective of expectations is to be fulfilled, otherwise, the disappointment generated by their non-fulfilment is unpleasantly painful.
So that, the existence of an expectation subjects us to its obligatory fulfillment, with all the personal pressure and towards others that all this entails in order for these expectations to take place as expected.
Practice positive emotional self-management.
Emotional self-management, with sobriety, empathy, and deep compassion, allows adequate emotional and psychological functioning of human beings, and it is essential to overcome a disappointment in love, family, etc. To achieve this, in this article, we show you how to practice empathy in my life.
As occurs in other negative emotional situations, disappointment arises as a result of inefficient emotional management of the person. Practicing positive emotional self-management will help a person overcome life's disappointments and not fall for them so easily in future situations.
Accept that not everything is in our hands.
Emotional self-management involves aspects such as the ability to manage the emotions that arise in conflict situations. One of the conclusions that adequate emotional self-management leads us to is the acceptance that not all aspects of our lives are in our hands.
Thus, another key to avoiding disappointment is to accept this fact, since allows us to free ourselves us and others of false expectations and resume relationships in a much more respectful and conciliatory way.
Learn to respect the decisions of others.
Not everything depends on us, so to overcome a disappointment we must respect the decisions of others, even if they do not fit with what we want. Doing so implies a significant degree of maturity through which we can understand that we each have our own experiences and, therefore, we find ourselves at different times that lead us to make different decisions
Reaching this point entails a high degree of compassion, a fundamental value to guarantee fraternal and peaceful coexistence. In this article, we give you different keys to achieve good relations with others.
Learn from the negative experience.
As occurs in any personal crisis, the important thing is that at the end of the lived experience we achieve integrate vital learning that makes us better people, happier, helpful and kind to our neighbors.
So what do you do when you're disappointed? The important thing is to adopt the perspective that every stumble in life is a great opportunity of personal growth, however hard the battle may be, the end result will be enriching on a personal level and will also benefit everyone around us.
Live in a pure and authentic way as children do.
When psychology speaks of emotional self-management, in reality a series of traits have been categorized that, if we look closely, they correspond to the characteristics that naturally occur in children and girls
They live happily, without expectations, with a great feeling of conciliarity and empathy. The sobriety and wisdom that emerges innately from our little ones should be a daily example to overcome disappointments, face problems and live our lives.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to How to get over disappointment, we recommend that you enter our category of Emotions.
Bibliography
- Lipovetsky, G., & Richard, B. (2008). The society of deception (Vol. 127). Barcelona: Anagram.
- Preston, J. (2016). you can overcome depression. Spain, 13-19.
