What to do when you are LIED and KNOW the TRUTH

There are many types of liars. Those who lie to appear more, those who lie out of shame, out of fear, to achieve something, but there are also those who are true professionals. Those people who believe their own lies and act as if everything they say is real. And these are the most complicated, because they will fight through thick and thin for you to believe what they say.

But how do you face someone who lies to you? In this online Psychology article, we want to help you be prepared to know what to do when they lie to you and you know the truth.

Index

1. How to know if someone is lying
2. What to do when they lie to you
3. How to treat a lying person

How do you know if a person is lying or telling the truth? We commonly believe that there are infallible keys to knowing when someone is lying. However, there is only one sure way to unmask a liar: with evidence. The rest of the tactics or strategies that you can use are not conclusive, but they alert you to signs that the other person may be lying to you. Let's see the keys to know if someone is lying:

• Line of conduct: what more data can give you to notice changes in someone's behavior, is to know how they behave regularly. If you start from there, you will be able to observe some different gestures than usual. If you know how he expresses himself, if he is usually relaxed or nervous or looking into his eyes, you will notice the changes more accurately. But be careful, it is not 100% effective, as some people change their behavior when they feel pressured.
• BackgroundIf you know that this person has lied to you before, or is frequent, the probability that he is lying increases significantly. Who doesn't know someone who lies almost as much as he talks?
• AlibisIf you wonder how to catch a liar, doing it is going to depend a lot on the context. If the person you distrust has an alibi with a friend, ask questions they don't expect to have to answer. Simple things like what station sounded when they were in the car or if they had the drink in the glass or in the bottle.
• History backwards- Lie detection professionals use a technique that involves asking the suspect to tell what happened starting at the end. Based on their story, they can identify errors in the story and find out what they are lying about.
• Interruptions- Change the subject in the middle of the story and see their reaction. Someone who lies will be relieved by the change of subject. If you tell the truth, you will be surprised and ask the reason for this change.
• Increases pressure (cognitive stress)- Ask a lot of details and then ask them again in another way. If you have been under cognitive stress, it may take time to answer or give a different response. This tactic is not very reliable because a person who is telling the truth and is somewhat stunned may also doubt or be wrong. Discover how to fight stress.
• Gestures and communication style- Shy people have a hard time looking into the eyes and it does not mean they are lying. "If he responds defensively, he is lying"... It may be, but it is not safe, or would it not be reasonable for him to feel attacked with so many questions? Whether or not you look at your hands, whether you look left or right, etc. They may be indications, but all these gestures have an alternative explanation, therefore, they are not always true.
• Intuition: perhaps your instinct is the most powerful weapon to detect when they lie to you. Take advantage of your intuition and look for data to confirm it. If you are especially jealous or suspicious, this is not a good technique because it is conditioned.

¿How to act when a person lies to you? Know what to do when they lie to you when you know they are doing it, it will depend a lot on the situation, of your relationship with the person and of the consequences of the lie.

Knowing what to do when they lie to you and you know the truth is not easy. If the person who lies to you is your partner, the most advisable thing is to talk to hers from calm and let him know that you know that he is lying. Ask him the reason for his lies and explain that relationships usually do not work if there is no sincerity.

If the lie you have identified fits into the “white lies”, such as when a family member or close friend hides a disease or illness from you partner omits what has been said about you in a meeting because it has no significance, you can continue with your life without mentioning it so as not to create conflict. On the other hand, you can also tell them that you know the truth to get more information on the matter. If you know the other person well, you will act in the most convenient way.

In this article, you will find information about how to forget someone who has hurt you.

Let's start from the fact that nobody likes to be lied to. When someone tells you something that you know is a lie, it offends you. You feel offended because you suppose that person thinks you are gullible or thinks that you are not very intelligent.

So how do you treat a person who lies to you? Well think about their motives and what is best for you. There are times when it is better to play the liar's game than to try to change him. In the face of a habitual liar there is little to do if you want to continue having a relationship with him / her, either because you have no other choice or because you want him to continue in your life.

If the lies are stories with the purpose of being noticed or appearing interesting, they do not affect your life and can be ignored. If on the contrary, affect you in some way, you better face the liar. Most often, he denies everything until he is cornered or invents new lies to explain the first. But in the end he will confess and when he does, you will know the reasons that lead him to lie. In this article, we tell you how tell the truth even if it hurts.

This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

If you want to read more articles similar to What to do when they lie to you and you know the truth, we recommend that you enter our category of Personal growth and self-help.

• Forner Navarro, P (2018). Run your life. Madrid: Planet.
• Moisés de la Serna, J. (2015). Mythomania: Spotting the Liar. Tektime.
• Roca, E. (2003). How to improve your social skills. Valencia: ACDE Editions.