What is the EGO and how does it work?

The ego is a psychic entity that we build to navigate our days throughout our lives. It is about the construction of a series of action mechanisms that allow us to express ourselves and adapt to this world. and that they are created from the moment in which our essential Being is not allowed to manifest as needs to.

In the following Psychology-Online article we will expose what is the ego and how does it operate, how to recognize it and how to remove it.

Index

1. What is a person's ego
2. How the ego works
3. How to recognize the ego: examples
4. Differences between ego and being
5. How to remove a person's ego

The "I" or ego of a person refers to "character" that we have created about ourselves and we have internalized as the image that represents us, the being we think we are. The ego is the result of the sum, combination, structuring and elaboration of our experiences occurred from gestation, throughout childhood to adolescence and from our interpretation of them.

From the psychoanalytic approach, the ego is based on the "reality principle" and supposes the adjustment it makes our organism between these two psychic instances to adapt to the family and social system in which it is find:

• The "it": the innate needs that the person feels from the beginning of life and whose satisfaction, in most cases, guarantees the survival and it favors their optimal development (for example: crying when they are hungry, when they need affection, when they are afraid; suckling at the breast as a vital need for nourishment and protection; request presence and affective care; move freely; explore the world; etc.)
• The "superego" (or moral conscience): from the age of 4 or 5, this psychic entity begins to develop in a linguistic-verbal way, but from the very beginning of pregnancy an internal discourse is created about what's right and what's wrong, how we should act, who we are, how much we are worth, what we have to do to receive love, how we should protect ourselves, etc. that, in these primary moments, are registered at the bodily and non-verbal level, therefore, at a very unconscious level, but whose force on us is immense, precisely because of their unconsciousness.

For this adjustment, the ego makes use of different "defense mechanisms" through which manages the combination between these needs and the internal moral discourse to end up constituting the definitive personality, the character that the person will represent in his life.

The functioning of the ego is as follows: the baby / child feels, from the beginning of his life, impulses that lead him to act with the intention of satisfying these needs. But it happens that sometimes, said needs are not covered just as you need. In these moments the baby suffers a great anxiety and pain.

When this situation is repeated in the face of the same need, it occurs at a critical moment in vital development (for example, during pregnancy, during birth or before one year of age). life) or with a high level of intensity (some neglect or abuse), the baby makes an association between the impulse / need for it and the response received, concluding a certain idea / feeling that internalize as belief about himself and what he deserves from others (constituting himself as a superego or moral conscience).

Re-living this situation causes him pain but, nevertheless, he continues to feel that urge / need. What cannot directly and healthily satisfy this need, will look for an alternative solution that will be determined by the internalized belief about the situation (the superego). The result of all this will be the creation of certain "Defense mechanism" that will allow you to cope without so much pain that urge.

According to Anna Freud there are the following defense mechanisms:

• Repression: mechanism that eliminates, repressing in the unconscious, any situation or experience that causes pain (example: not remembering that sexual abuse has been experienced in childhood).
• Denial: denying some fact or feeling due to the inability of the person to accept and integrate it.
• Projection: it is a type of denial of feelings or desires that are attributed to another for not being able to recognize and accept them in oneself.
• Rationalization: allows you to provide a rational explanation for a fact or emotion that could not otherwise be accepted
• Intellectualization: mechanism by which the person analyzes in detail the situations to put distance with respect to the feelings and emotions of her and, in this way, not to suffer.
• Reactive training: it leads the person to express precisely the behavior or emotion contrary to what was felt, for not being able to accept that own feeling.
• Regression: Faced with a situation of stress or discomfort, the person will return to behaviors typical of childhood evolutionary stages in which she was fixed, that is, that she was not able to resolve.
• Displacement: the focus that causes our anxiety or anger is replaced by another to reduce the discomfort that would be generated by directly expressing the emotion about the main causing focus.
• Sublimation: This mechanism transforms a potentially dangerous impulse into socially acceptable behavior.

In this article we talk in depth about the defense mechanisms of Anna Freud.

With what has been said, the ego is built on the basis of not listening and not accepting one's own needs (denial, sublimation, projection, etc.) as a result of the anguish or fear that the original experience of non-attention of his impulse. Therefore, the ego is built on frustration of all these needs along with irrational listening to a series of false beliefs about ourselves (superego). As a result of all this, the ego is constituted as a weak and fearful part of ourselves that comes out to battle with sword and shield to defend yourself from the hostile world in which you live through the different mechanisms of defending.

How can we recognize the ego?

• To recognize the ego it is enough listen to us internally and detect, of the behaviors we do, those that will always make us feel bad, they will hurt us. Even when the behavior is hurting the outside (for example, being haughty or aggressive towards others), internally it is hurting us as well by being ego-directed. In fact, over the years, the continued manifestation of this entity damages the person who, to heal, manifests these wounds through all kinds of diseases (physical or emotional).
• Another way to recognize it is through the body. The egoic behaviors always suppose the contraction from any part of the body (breathing, eyes, jaws, thorax, abdomen, cervical, etc.). Body work is a great help to detect our contracted areas.
• The third way to recognize the ego is to observe what part of us generates such behavior. When it is motivated by our ego, it is directed by negative thoughts (fear, distrust, resentment, etc.) or by negative emotions (anger, sadness, anxiety, uncontrolled joy, etc.).

Some examples of selfish behaviors would be the following:

• Dominant and manipulative: people with these behaviors control situations to feel safe. Here you can see more information about the manipulative people.
• Aggressive-defensive: distrustful people who always see the negative in situations and defend themselves by attacking.
• Elusive-avoidant: people who avoid facing certain situations so as not to face the discomfort that it entails.
• Scary-scary: equally distrustful people whose response to certain aspects is fear, paralysis and contraction.
• SmartyKnowing everything, or believing it, gives you the security you need. In this article we talk about arrogant and arrogant people.
• Proud: he is unable to recognize when he has made a mistake.
• Hoarder- Your behavior is always aimed at being the center of attention.

Being clear about what the ego is, we can differentiate it from what the BEING or authentic manifestation of the person is, which is beyond selfish behaviors.

The clearest expression of our authentic Being can be observed in babies and children of early ages. People are born pure and free from any type of external or internal conditioning. In these moments, our being manifests itself in a way real and authentic existing a total coherence between what we feel and what we express. However, over the years, the external conditioning that we live through our experiences creates our ego and we begin to manifest ourselves through it. character as a way to survive and get what we need in this world.

Unlike the ego, the authentic Self is the direct reflection of our soul. He is kind, sincere, well-meaning, warm, cheerful, peaceful, brotherly, etc. The Being manifests the real and inherent values ​​of the human being that are violated as a consequence of the construction of the ego. In this article we explain the human values.

The elimination of the ego is not an easy task although it is necessary for the real healing of our souls and bodies if we want to change the world (the manifestations of the ego are the cause of the ills and injustices of this world). To eliminate the ego it will be necessary the "catharsis" or inner cleaning that will allow us re-connect with our essential Self, the real manifestation of ourselves.

The steps to carry out this catharsis process will be:

1. Conduct an introspection process to detect which defense mechanisms act in us. In this article you will find how to do an introspection exercise.
2. Search the origins that caused the constitution of said mechanisms.
3. Re-live that situation and be emotionally contained as we need at that moment.
4. Re-build that situation from the present moment, differentiating the truths from the lies that happened at that time.
5. Initiate a process of prohibition and rejection of lies that sustained the defense mechanisms, strengthening the benefits of our pure and authentic being.
6. Stay active, firm and alert in this discernment so as not to allow those old chimeras to re-establish themselves in moments of weakness and fragility.

The manifestation of our essential being is a process that should not be interrupted from childhood. However, taking into account the social system in which we find ourselves, it is complicated by the interferences and obstacles that occur when mothering / fathering / educating. It is, therefore, necessary to carry out the process of inner personal purification so that, by gradually freeing ourselves from our character, finally manifesting ourselves as the kind and fraternal beings what are we. Only in this way can we improve and change the world. Here we talk about respectful parenting.

This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

If you want to read more articles similar to What is the ego and how does it operate, we recommend that you enter our category of Personal growth and self-help.

• Alonso, A. (2015). Definition of the week: It, me and superego.
• López Morcillo, A. Understand the ego: discover why you are not who you think you are.