In the life of every person there are harsh situations that sometimes resultimpossible go out: a failuresentimental, the death of a loved one, the loss of a job, etc. It is normal that before an event of this type we feel sunk for a while, but little by little we will have to recover our motivation and the will to live. If not, and we find ourselves after a time even worse than when the event happened, we may be falling into the self pity.
When we we pity ourselves We victimize ourselves, that is, we see ourselves as puppets at the mercy of fate that can strike us again at any moment. This in turn leads us to feel powerless, which becomes a new episode of self-pity that again generates helplessness, anger, frustration and depression. And if we don't do anything about it, we can continue to feel that way for a long time.
To overcome self-pity, the first thing we must assume is that difficulties and bad times happen on the lifetime of all people, and that the situation we are going through is not due to the fact that the gods or the destination have us mania.
We must also bear in mind that, although we cannot control everything that happens around us, we can control how we feel about what happens to us. Therefore, if we are immersed in a situation that we do not like, we must draw up an action plan to get out of it, seeing the resources we have to achieve it.
Finally, another of the points that we will have change is he language. We will avoid expressions such as “I can't help it”, “this is terrible for anyone”, “I will never be lucky”, changing them for others that make us feel that we can get hold of the situation as "this time" or "I can." etc.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
