In our day to day, selfish behaviors can lead to a lot of conflicts. Being able to put the needs of others before our own can be a very difficult habit to develop, especially if it does not come naturally to us. We must not forget that the process to overcome selfishness is slow and must be done step by step and also, a person can be selfish in some areas of his life and not be in others.
In the same way, selfishness does not always have negative effects in our life, there are situations in which it is appropriate and adaptive. In this Psychology-Online article we tell you how to overcome selfishness in our daily lifeas well as some situations in which it may be appropriate to be selfish.
Index
- How selfishness interferes in your life
- How to overcome selfishness in our day to day
- Types of positive selfishness
How selfishness interferes in your life.
To know how to overcome selfishness in our daily life, We must try to identify how selfishness generates problems in our life, in order to begin to eliminate self-centered actions and rebuild our day to day.
Selfishness generates more conflict
When we act selfishly we generate controversy or disagreements in various vital areas. Throughout our lives we have seen people who not only encounter conflict, but actively seek it out. They seem to enjoy the moments of arguing and fighting. Not only do they disagree on some things, they seem to want to be. It is generally not pleasant to be around these types of people. This is a subtle form of selfishness, through these conflicts the person becomes the center of attention they need and feels self-sufficient.
Being selfish kills your joy or fun
Selfishness often limits the ability to enjoy things because he always finds something wrong with everything. This can become a way of expressing selfishness as it is a way of feeling in control for a critical person, makes you feel above others in a position of self-proclaimed authority because you have identified a mistake in the others parts.
Selfishness leads to unrealistic expectations
Selfishness makes the selfish person expect too much from others, and it is more subtle when it comes to what one should give oneself.
A person with too many expectations for himself never accepts a compliment, never feels like he has succeeded, even when he has clearly done something. They may seem humble because they are tough on themselves, but on the inside they consider themselves far superior to the rest.
This is another subtle form of selfishness because it ignores one's natural limitations and assumes that one should be able to do anything at any time. Although the positive thinking It is a good thing, the reality is that most of us are not capable of doing what we want to do, even if we propose to do so. We all have limitations and we must learn to accept them as part of our humanity.
In conclusion, a person who expects too much of herself who does not accept a compliment and feels that it is too good for certain people can lose many people around him and cause a lot of tension and damage.
Selfishness limits the ability to improve
Most of us have a hard time accepting criticism, but at the same time, we know that it takes some criticism to improve.
In the case of selfishness there is a total rejection of any type of criticism, it is considered that a true friend is one who focuses only on its positive aspects and ignores the negative ones. So when someone offers helpful criticism with the intention of helping you, they interpret it as contempt and disrespect.
How to overcome selfishness in our day to day.
Some tips that you can keep in mind to overcome selfishness in your life are:
Be honest with yourself
First of all, to know how to stop being envious and selfishYou must admit that selfishness is interfering in your relationships. Next, you must identify the areas that are being negatively affected by selfish behaviors, this can help you to start changing them. However, identifying these self-centered behaviors will not be easy and can be very painful. Accepting a negative truth about yourself and trying to change it is something that ultimately brings motivation.
Replace selfish habits
Changing habits in the long term is possible with careful and consistent planning, paying attention to the details of your behavior. Observe your interactions with other people and identify those areas in which you are selfish. Try to find ways on how you can replace selfish behaviors. To stop being selfish, focus on how your relationships can be improved if you overcome selfishness in your day-to-day life. Although it can be very hard at first, in time you will see the benefits.
Think of the others first
Put the wants and needs of others first, this is one of the fundamental rules to overcome selfishness. Not being selfish involves giving your time, energy, attention, or money to other people when necessary. It is common for us to try to justify ourselves for what we do, but we must remember that relationships do not They are perfect and that we should treat others in the same way that we would like others to treat us.
Do not give up
Deciding to change a deeply rooted pattern in relationships will take a lot of effort. Difficulties can make you doubt and think that it would be better to throw in the towel, but you should not get discouraged and try to remember why you want to overcome selfishness. A good way to overcome your selfishness is to try to overcome obstacles.
Types of positive selfishness.
Despite the above, there are times when it may be appropriate to be a little selfish. Next, we present the positive selfishness:
When you are faced with a decision that is important to you
Sometimes the decisions we make involve other people, but other times big decisions like it can be moving to another city, ending a relationship... they force you to think about yourself and less about the rest. It is important to take into account everything relevant when making important decisions, but in the end we must choose the best decision for ourselves.
When happiness is involved
Being happy is something we all strive for, especially if we haven't had the life we need or want for ourselves. Sometimes being happy means letting go of things that no longer work for you or do not suit you. Being happy requires a bit of selfishness on our part to get what each of us deserves.
When it comes to health
Health is ours and ours alone. Therefore, being selfish in this regard is essential. The way we choose to take care of ourselves is ours alone and no one else's.
When you need to spend time alone
Spending time alone is a good reason to be selfish. We all need our alone time to do things we like, get to know each other, etc. So sometimes you have to be selfish to find time for yourself.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to How to overcome selfishness in our daily life, we recommend that you enter our category of Personal growth and self-help.
