Passive-aggressive personality disorder is a condition that is characterized by the fact that the person who suffers it resists meeting their obligations, responsibilities and external requirements of their life daily. People with this disorder do not directly express their aggression or their disagreement with others, however, they make it known through their actions by refusing to comply and collaborate. The actions that they habitually take to avoid fulfilling their obligations and commitment to others are, for example, obstruction, forgetfulness, irresponsibility, lack of organization, among others, which makes it practically impossible to have a good coexistence with they. This type of disorder is more common than it seems and it is very difficult for people who suffer from it to ask for help because they themselves do not recognize that they have it.
In this Psychology-Online article about Passive-aggressive personality disorder: characteristics and treatment, we are going to delve into this type of condition and explain the characteristics that the people who suffer from it, what are its possible causes and the treatment that should be followed to fix it.
There are a series of characteristics that identify passive-aggressive people. Among the most common characteristics are the following:
- Challenging behavior towards others. They are people who intentionally fail to meet the expectations that others have of them. They tend to adopt attitudes of irresponsibility and even passive aggression towards others in any area of their life. For example, in the work area they tend to turn in their work at the wrong time, they are not responsible for the mistakes they make and may even unjustly blaming others for them, among other things that demonstrate their lack of commitment and, in this way, their aggression towards others people.
- Dependence on others. Have a strong dependency towards other people although they try by all means to hide it. In extreme situations, their dependency comes out, becoming quite noticeable. They really want to feel independent from others and that is why it is difficult for them to obey orders and give in to the other, however, they need all the time to be done favors.
- Negativity These people are also characterized by their great pessimism and negativity. They spend all the time complaining that life is going badly for them, about the bad luck they have had, they predict that what they are going to do will go wrong, among other things.
- Lying to others. One of the attitudes that people with this type of condition adopt is to lie to others, since they do not know how to act assertively and when Something does not seem right to them, they do not speak directly with the other, they simply decide to do the opposite of what was agreed and lie about the situation. For example, if you agreed with your partner to buy a television in a certain way and actually that model he does not like it, he will go and buy the one that he (she) likes and will tell her partner that she did not find the other one in any store.
- They hold a grudge easily. They tend to hold a grudge towards others because they almost always want to express what they feel to the other.
- False regret. If they come to recognize that they have had a bad behavior with another person, which costs them a lot, to even though they apologize to him, they keep repeating the same action that made him angry. other.
- They hint at others. Because they do not know how to act assertively and express their disagreement to others in the way more appropriate, they do it by means of hints that even attack more than if they did directly. When other people ask you for an explanation about the hints thrown, they often deny that they were giving them hints and that they are wrong if they felt it.
- Ineffectiveness and lack of responsibility. As they do not know how to openly express their dissatisfaction with others, they adopt irresponsible and ineffective behaviors in what they do. For example, if at work the boss entrusts them with a task that he must carry out, it is shown with all the willingness to do it, however, in the end he ends up doing it wrong, at the wrong time and even opts not do it.
- Resentment and envy. They tend to resent and envy people who seem to be doing better than them. They make negative comments about these people by criticizing them excessively because of the envy that generates them that they are as he (she) would like.
Passive-aggressive personality disorder is usually evident regularly in early adulthood, the exact cause of this disorder it is unknownHowever, as in almost all personality disorders, it has an environmental and genetic origin. Some of the most common causes that have been found in this type of disorder are the following:
- Having been abused in childhood by parents or guardians.
- People with very low self-esteem.
- Having had negative family dynamics in childhood and adolescence.
- Substance abuse during adolescence.
- Having had parents who have suffered from the same disorder.
- Having learned this type of passive-aggressive behavior since childhood.
It is necessary to take into account that other mental health conditions can lead to this type of passive-aggressive behavior, such as:
- Bipolar disorder.
- Stress and anxiety.
- Attention deficit disorder and hyperactivity.
- Depression.
- Other personality disorders.
When a person with passive-aggressive personality disorder seeks help to solve their problem, it is usually because they have increased considerably their conflicts with other people and they fail to understand what is really going on or they have the feeling of not being able to avoid acting the way in which they make. It is necessary that people with this type of condition receive specialized help such as psychological help to first identify this problem and, once identified, to be able to carry out actions to eliminate it.
The main objective of the sessions is for the person to achieve identify passive-aggressive behaviors specific issues that generate more problems in their relationship with others, then they are taught to modify them by others more positive and adaptive.
The person is also taught strategies for manage your emotions that generate more suffering such as anger and resentment, while working to improve your low self-esteem problem that you are suffering from.
Another important aspect that is worked on in the sessions is the assertiveness, so the person is taught assertive behaviors so that they can express their opinions and wishes of the way she wants it without having to hide or express them aggressively and disrespectful.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
