How long does the mourning for a breakup last?

  • Jul 26, 2021
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How long does the mourning for a breakup last?

After a couple breakup there is a moment of mourning, a forgetfulness stage that is necessary to heal the wounds that remain open after goodbye. Each story is different and each person has their own self-improvement process. However, the first year after the breakdown of a stable relationship is very important.

This first year is a personal turning point, it implies the adaptation of the person to a new life, leaving behind all the shared moments and performing new dynamics that you previously shared with another person, for example: important personal dates, holidays, family dinners, holidays...

However, the grieving process must stop at some point, it is not good for your health to maintain a depressed state due to a breakup. If you still wonder "How long does the mourning for a breakup last?"We invite you to continue reading this Psychology-Online article.

You may also like: How to be strong in a couple breakup

Index

  1. How long does it take to forget someone?
  2. Self-discovery process
  3. The pathological grief
  4. How to overcome pathological grief?

How long does it take to forget someone?

It is not the same to forget an unrequited love than to forget a sentimental partner with whom we have spent many moments. It is commonly said that men take less time to get over a breakup than women but that is not the case. Each person is unique And although there are differences in behavior between women and men, it is not always a reflection of their real feelings.

While it is true that they can be appreciated very similar phases in all grieving processes For a break, there is no set time that marks the end of it. It depends on many variables, such as, for example, the type of relationship you had, if that person is still in our circle of friends or works with us, if the breakup was a traumatic process ...

It is difficult to know exactly how long to grieve a breakup, however, generally, overcome sadness after a separation it usually takes between a few months and a year.

How long does the mourning for a breakup last? - How long does it take to forget someone?

Self-discovery process.

This first year is a process of self-discovery. Despite having our illusions broken and experiencing an affective disappointment, we can feel at first person that gratifying experience of living life in each stage with the positive that each moment has, we learn to Forget the past and live the present.

The process of forgetting is marked by the sadness, However, this sadness does not prevent us from enjoying happy moments. Throughout this process of self-discovery, we are overcoming important challenges related to the process of forgetting and self-improvement. Conquering these goals makes us stronger and increases our self-esteem.

During this stage, we need establish new habits and other routines that they stay away from everything that reminds us of our ex-partner. Therefore, we must consolidate new customs that provide security and emotional independence. The passage of time also helps to observe the couple's relationship with greater distance and this perspective can also provide us with greater objectivity. Over time, we will feel better after the breakup.

The pathological grief.

There are times when the sadness after the separation does not stop with the passage of time. While it is true that each person has their own grieving process, if it is exceeded and prevents us from leading a normal life, we may be suffering a pathological grief.

This type of grief is defined as an intense, negative and long-lasting feeling after a loss. In the case of suffering a pathological grief, we can resort to maladaptive behaviors that do not solve the problem, we could even develop addictions to avoid pain and fill the constant emptiness that we feel inside. Pathological grief negatively limits our day-to-day life, impedes personal growth and happiness, and does not allow us to fully overcome the breakup. We must be able to cope with the loss. Otherwise, if we do not treat it correctly, we will continue to carry this unpleasant feeling.

There are various factors that could be the cause of pathological grief, among the most influential we find the following:

  • Insecure personality
  • Low resilience
  • Low selfsteem
  • Little or no social support
  • Existence of other mental health disorders

All of them are factors that intervene in the appearance of the duel and suppose obstacles in self-improvement that prevent us from going our own way. Grief is necessary but it is not healthy for it to become pathological.

How long does the mourning for a breakup last? - The pathological grief

How to overcome pathological grief?

Assuming that we are living without a partner is the first step in overcoming pathological grief. It seems obvious, however, we can get to cling to the idea that that person will return or that without it we are not happy. It is important to remember that we do not need a better half to complement us, we are strong and independent people in all life situations.

We can try to overcome pathological grief through self-help exercises that strengthen our self-esteem and provide us with tools to learn to live far from emotional dependence. Learning to be self-reliant is also good grief therapy. In this way, we will realize that we do not really need that person that we think we need to be happy.

If we continue to drag pain and suffering after a separation, we should consider consulting a specialist to help us get out of this spiral. A correct psychological therapy can help us prevent grief from leading to major depression or other affective disorder.

This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

If you want to read more articles similar to How long does the mourning for a breakup last?, we recommend that you enter our category of Couple therapy.

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