Just when it seemed that you were beginning to understand what ghosting was, what it meant to stalk someone, now another new term called orbiting appears. It seems that this relationship thing, since the appearance of social networks, is becoming more and more complicated and new terms and behaviors that were not practiced in other times continue to appear constantly.
But it is that networks are already part of our day to day, to the point that they have caused changes in the way we relate to each other and meet new people. Before, when you stopped liking someone you had known for a while, you just told them and/or stopped seeing each other. But now, with networks, that contact can still exist. For this reason, in this Psychology-Online article we explain what is orbiting, the signs to identify it and how to act in front of it. Keep reading!
Index
- what is orbiting
- Signs to identify orbiting
- How to act before orbiting
What is orbiting?
Orbiting is a behavior that occurs when a relationship between two people ends. There is no more explicit interaction, you stop seeing each other and talking, butthere are still interactions on social networks, like looking at Instagram stories, liking posts, and even sharing your content in their stories or with their friends and comment on your posts, but without engaging in a conversation with you.
Summarizing what orbiting is: it is one of the types of ghosting through social networks, whose practice appears identically, but it is characterized by the fact that, in addition to the interruption of communication, there is still a link through platforms on-line. That is, when they ghost you and come back; the contact of a romantic relationship or friendship ends without giving explanations and ignoring any communication. And all of a sudden, you get samples of interactions on Instagram.
Signals to identify orbiting.
The end of the communication it can be both unexpected and gradual, and permanent or relative to a specific period of time (such as during the holidays). We find different motivations that can lead a person to practice orbiting, among them we find that it is an easy way to cut off communication without involving a great effort.
Some of the main signs that can help us identify could be:
- Face-to-face meetings decrease.
- Increase communication through networks, by messages instead of direct communication.
- The other person remains distant, there is no feedback for his part but if he likes your publications.
How to act before orbiting.
Orbiting is generally characterized by different states, specifically 3 according to Williams (2009) which would be:
- Reflexive. This stage occurs immediately after detection and produces a rapid response. characterized by social pain, a reappraisal of basic psychological needs and emotions negative.
- reflective. This second stage occurs after people reflect, after they have been able to think about it and integrate the situation into their experience. In this state people begin to recover from the initial response.
- Resignation. Characterized by feelings of alienation and, in some cases, depression.
Therefore, after receiving orbiting behaviors, and during and/or after these stages, reactions characterized by:
- Surprise and confusion.
- Anger, sadness and guilt.
- Attempts to repair the relationship.
- Acceptance.
What to do if you get orbited
Some authors such as Freedman et al. (2019) maintain that the strong beliefs in destiny on the part of the victims of orbiting would act as a factor protector to accept the cut of communication and the interaction in networks, since they attribute the fact to the will of the destination.
If we suffer from orbiting, it will be important to act, on the one hand, with personal self-care to be able to integrate the experience into our life history in a healthy way and without it affecting us excessively, being able to come out "stronger" from the experience.
On the other hand, if we feel that it will help us, we can communicate to the other person how this situation makes us feel and, even, if their interaction with us on social networks bothers us a lot, delete it and/or block it in order to avoid the discomfort and negative emotions that it causes us.
How to avoid orbiting
In order to avoid future situations of orbiting in future relationships, we can put on the table, as a condition within the relationship (of whatever type), the fact of communicating when we want to end it for any reason to the other person and being able to talk about it.
Many times there are situations that make us uncomfortable due to lack of communication from the beginning. That's why it's important present our conditions when we start relationships.
If you liked this article about what orbiting is, signs to identify it and how to act; We recommend you read our post about Ghosting: What is it, causes and types Y Breadcrumbing: what it is, signs to identify it and how to act.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to Orbiting: what it is, signs to identify it and how to act, we recommend that you enter our category of Couple therapy.
Bibliography
Pancani, L., Mazzoni, D., Aureli, N., & Riva, P. (2021). Ghosting and orbiting: An analysis of victims' experiences. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 38(7), 1987–2007.
