The 12 tools to not judge others

Human nature makes us be prejudiced. In fact, we almost always adopt a prejudgment of people we don't know well and with whom we have had very little interaction. However, an evaluative judgment is not necessarily a bad thing, since it is this action that helps us to better understand what surrounds us. The catch is that our preconceptions, snap judgments, and perfection syndrome get in the way of our balanced, neutral judgment.

Moreover, we even judge to protect ourselves from danger or because we are afraid of others. For this reason, in this Psychology-Online article we will tell you how not to judge others. In this way, you will analyze the causes of judgment and see how you can change this bad habit to prevent your critical thoughts or words from harming others.

Index

1. become aware
2. Look at yourself first before others
3. learn to depersonalize
4. do mindfulness
5. Accept yourself as you are
6. Not everything is what it seems
7. all people are different
8. we all have something good
9. Apply active listening
10. Focus on the positive and not on the differences
11. accept reality
12. Open your mind

The first step to not judge others is be aware of your actions, ideas and emotions. It's not about simply being on your toes all the time. It is rather learning to interpret the world around us so as not to act on impulse and then fall into regret.

But this is easier done than said, since becoming fully aware requires discipline and perseverance to foster a habit that lodges in our mental schemes. In this sense, you can start with small steps. For example, try to stop before you speak or say anything so that you analyze in detail if what you are going to say is positive or benefits someone.

What's more, reflect on your daily actions so that you learn to put aside harmful attitudes and ideas towards other people. Remember that what you say can no longer be erased. In other words, reformulate your thoughts so that you replace negative ones with empowering thoughts or, in any case, avoid expectations and just live in the moment.

"See yourself in the mirror first, before judging others." This phrase has been repeated hundreds of times, but very few people truly internalize it. In fact, the usual thing is that we hardly ever, if ever, stop to evaluate our own shortcomings to try to improve certain attitudes.

Instead, we use a lot of energy to criticize and see the shortcomings of those around us. Therefore, it is good that you start a very simple mental exercise, in which you focus on the positive things about people and not on what your prejudices or false expectations only let you see.

Something very useful not to judge or stop doing it, believe it or not, is that when someone treats us badly or does not agree with our ideas, we do not take it personally. In fact, it may be that that person is going through a bad time and you haven't even noticed it.

Therefore, you must understand that everyone has their own internal struggles, and that does not mean that people are against you. Learn to separate the reactions of others. Thus, little by little you will stop judging the behavior of those around you.

One of the best techniques to learn not to judge others is to practice mindfulness. This philosophy based on Buddhism, and which translates as mindfulness, has several essential principles that are of great help to cultivate serenity and avoid prejudice. These principles are as follows:

• Focus on the present.
• Learn not to judge.
• Encourage patience.
• Observe and experiment.
• Let go and trust.

There are many exercises and relaxation techniques based on mindfulness that can help you not to judge others. Also, you can support yourself with audiovisual material or with an expert who will guide you in this magnificent ancestral practice.

Another strategy for not judging others is accept us and understand ourselves as we are. When we are able to appreciate our true qualities and capabilities, we will begin to become aware of our virtues. In this way, self-esteem and appreciation are fostered.

Also, when we are more understanding with ourselves, a reciprocity develops that helps us to be more empathetic with the rest. In other words, as long as you're happy, you don't need to harm anyone.

One of the most popular and old sayings is “appearances are deceiving”. Actually, this is a great truth because when we judge only by appearances, both for good and for bad, we fall into a great error that can be compromising.

What does it mean not to judge others? It means taking time to evaluate the whole context, without showing prejudices or advanced positions regarding the situation. let it all flow to really see the reality of things.

How not to judge people? If there is something to understand, it is that, if something characterizes people, it is that each one has your own ideas, beliefs and thoughts, which are derived from the scheme of values ​​that they have acquired throughout their lives. That must be respected!

It is important to stop seeing the world from only one perspective. Remember that what other people do or say has nothing to do with you, but with their own way of being.

One of the best ways to develop the ability to not judge others is to focus on the positive qualities of people. I mean, try find the good characteristics of others, and you will see that everyone has something valuable. Also, not everyone always seeks to harm you. Therefore, start valuing, instead of constantly defending yourself.

When people are very critical, it is usual that they do not pay attention to the point of view of others. This is a very common quality in those who love to judge or jump to conclusions, without listening carefully to the other person.

To avoid that, you need to practice active listening. That is, you will not only hear their words, but you will try to "put yourself in their shoes" without making hasty judgments. For that, you can apply these simple recommendations:

• Do not interrupt who speaks to you and fully listens to your message.
• If you have questions, leave them for the end of his story.
• Watch her body language carefully to see if she's sad or showing another emotion.

Furthermore, it is important that don't compare yourself with that person, since perhaps they are going through a bad time and just need someone to listen to them, that is the true value of not judging: understanding.

One of the main ways not to judge others is by recognizing that, despite being different, we all have certain things in common. Sometime, we all have weaknesses, fears or even feelings of failure, and that does not mean that we have less value as human beings.

Therefore, try not to judge the attitudes that make you uncomfortable. Rather, reflect on the times you have been through similar situations and think about the way they have made you feel.

If you want to learn not to judge others, acceptance is one of the fundamental steps to overcome critical and prejudiced attitudes. In other words, you must allow each person to be as he is actually to accept her with her faults and successes.

Furthermore, it recognizes that you can't be in control all the time. Neither do you have the right to change others, just to adapt them to your way of being. Of course, if it is in your hands, you can guide that person to also be more tolerant and understanding. In this way, a healthy coexistence and a strong interrelationship are encouraged. It's all about giving alike.

People open to life experiences are a magnet to attract interesting people around them. Therefore, learn to open your mind to new ideas and points of view, always trying to accept the position of others and above all, respecting their way of being.

Take into account that nobody is perfect and that each person is a source to learn new things every day. Take the opportunity. Finally, remember that by judging others you are not defining them, you are only defining yourself.

This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

If you want to read more articles similar to How not to judge others, we recommend that you enter our category of Personal growth and self-help.

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