As much as we want to avoid them, the conflicts with others they are inevitable. Whether it is our partner, family members, friends, co-workers or even strangers, the difference of points of view, desires, aspirations and objectives makes, at a given moment, we find ourselves immersed in a conflict. This idea usually has a negative connotation, but depending on how we solve it, this situation can help us grow as people and be something positive or it can fill us with resentment and cloud our relationship with that person for the future. Faced with a conflict, we can take three different attitudes.
In this case, the conflict is seen as a war, and to reach a solution it is assumed that one of the parties will be the winner and the other a loser, being only possible the absolute surrender of the other.
In these cases it is tried above all impose your own points of view and we feel attacked and violated, which usually leads us to a dialectic in which both parties can result damaged, but especially the losing part, which will only wait for the moment to be the winner in the next conflict.
We start from the basis that both parties must give up something or give up something (lose) to resolve the conflict. It is a better solution than the previous one, but it often leads to both parties feeling frustrated by the loss suffered.
It is the most positive attitude, because it starts from the premise that both parties involved in the conflict can achieve their objectives, that is, let them both win. For this, it is necessary to face the conflict with the will and creativity necessary to achieve a satisfactory solution for both parties. Making a good diagnosis of the problem and looking for solutions that take the other into account is essential in this strategy.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
