External circumstances are part of our reality and as such can condition us when we are not having a good time. However, human beings are free and creative, they have a great power of resilience. Therefore, external factors do not have a deterministic impact on your destiny, especially if you consciously decide that this does not happen because you know the power of your attitude. If you wonder how to be happy when everything goes wrong, Whether trying to be happy alone or as a couple, in Psychology-Online we give you some keys to smile.
Here are some ideas to help you achieve this.
1. Avoid absolute language
It is a very human statement to generalize and conclude that absolutely everything has a negative tone. However, this type of assessment should be avoided by taking care of the nuances of the language. Surely in the middle of that everything you can find some reason for the gratitude and optimism. Try to specify beyond generality.
2. Observe time as your ally
You can get carried away with impatience wondering how long all of this will last. However, change your perception of the weeks to realize that, in reality, this too will pass. You cannot know the exact time frame in which this is going to happen. What you do know in advance is that this circumstance has a temporary duration and, therefore, you can
3. Friendship and personal relationships
At such a time, having a support network will help increase optimism. The joys multiply their value when they are shared while the sadness weighs less thanks to the emotional effect of the company. Take care of your personal relationships and open your heart with those people who convey empathy to you.
4. Don't idealize happiness
In such a context, happiness also has a different color. In this circumstance, peace and tranquility help you to better cope with this pain. How to reach this point? Accept external circumstances and try to focus on what you can do, here and now, to feel better about yourself. Therefore, do not blame yourself for what you cannot control. Learn to take care of yourself and do not demand perfection from yourself. In fact, it is convenient that you repeat yourself more frequently than you are doing your part to move forward.
5. Find healthy stimuli of happiness
A pleasant walk, a movie session, leisure activities, a moment of reading, a conversation with a friend, mindful eating, satisfaction of a job well done, visualization of moments happy... Definitely, cultivate the illusion in a proactive way.
In such a circumstance, you can start moving in the direction of personal happiness from the determination of what is better not to do. If you want to know how to be happy when everything goes wrong, what you should do is follow these tips to avoid falling into common mistakes:
1. Don't hold others responsible for your unhappiness
This not only makes the situation worse, but also affects your personal relationships since others can distance themselves by feeling unfairly treated. It is important that you free yourself and others from this burden. Don't put so much power into external circumstances and start giving more weight to your inner creativity.
2. Dramatize
It is true that life, as if it were the script of a movie, also has certain overtones of drama in some parts of his argument when the tendency toward negativity seems the law that marks the course of events. But nevertheless, avoid this dramatic tone in evaluations and interpretations of reality.
You can do it through that attention to the message that we have explained above by avoiding absolute terms like always, never, all or nothing. Through the nuances of language, you also describe reality with more hope.
3. Not having empathy with you
Context is important, so be nice to yourself and understand your situation. That doesn't mean you have to feel sorry for yourself. It is recommended that you take into account the influence that the events of now can have on your state of mind. When there are reasons to be down, it is natural to experiment sad symptoms.
4. Don't shut yourself up
It may happen that don't want to talk to anyone of how you feel because you prefer not to worry your surroundings. However, it is important that you do not carry this burden alone and discuss all of this with a loyal confidant. That doesn't mean you necessarily need advice, but you do need to feel heard by someone else.
5. Beware of the complaint
As negative can be the chronic complaint as that attitude that leads you to repress any minimum complaint. Complaining can also be a healthy outlet at certain times. But nevertheless, don't feed this attitude until you make it a habit and recreate yourself in it. It is also not a good idea to drop the number of complaints to zero because this goal is unrealistic.
If you are going through a difficult time, it may help you to remember that in the past you have also been the protagonist of moments in which you put your ability to improve yourself into practice. Those moments left you lessons that can inspire you now to better cope with this chapter of your life:
- Even in difficult times life goes on. Therefore, do not stop your step until you are still in pain.
- Pain and suffering are not synonymous. The suffering is born from the recreation of the main reason that caused the injury.
- Difficult circumstances are not pleasant, however, sometimes they mark a turning point in the life of the protagonist who is wiser on a vital level after the overcoming of that period. That is, you grow internally.
- When you have a gray day, remember that tomorrow will be another day and it will be better. Sometimes you just need a little time to change your perspective.
- You can transform this situation and find real meaning in it if you live this process from a learning perspective. What can this situation teach you? And what can you offer to life at this decisive moment?
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
