Having a relationship with someone is usually linked to knowing and dealing with their family. And what if your new partner has children? Do you know how to treat them? Sometimes we may not get along with our partner's children. But everything can be solved with time, patience and some psychological advice.
How to treat my partner's children? This situation is not easy at all, in fact it is an issue that can generate many conflicts. In this Psychology-Online article we give you some tips about how to deal with and relate to your partner's children.
Index
- My partner's children are a problem: what do I do?
- What to do with problem stepchildren
- Tips for rebuilt families
My partner's children are a problem: what do I do?
In your mind there must be space for everyone, because for your partner their children will always be a priority. The ideal would be to take a neutral attitude, do not ignore their existence because in the end, as children of your partner they will always be present. But on the other hand you should not fill a role that does not correspond to you, the role of mother or father. Here are some tips for treating your partner's children:
As we were saying, at the beginning of the relationship with the children of your partner you should stay out of the role of father or mother trying do not impose your opinions. This can make you feel a bit "isolated", but you must understand that it is the parents who have to decide about their children. On the other hand, it is important that your partner helps you to have a place within the family, your place in this case is that you are the "new" partner of his / her father / mother. Show yourself natural and willing to collaborate and help but without overwhelming.
It is essential to create a climate of trust, empathy and complicity. Look for things in common to create spaces in which you feel comfortable and keep in mind that trust arises over time.
Once you feel that a climate of trust has been created and you become a close person to your partner's children, then you can go a little further and be someone they can turn to for help or just company. The new family structure will need to share experiences and experiences that will gradually make everyone relax and enjoy time together.
Always keep in mind that although you have achieved a good relationship with your partner's children, you do not have to never replace their parents, unless it is strictly necessary due to the absence of some role parental.
What to do with problem stepchildren.
Patience and time One has to be very patient, each child is different and with some it may cost more to connect, but with perseverance and a correct attitude you will foster a good relationship in which there is, above all, I respect. Having a change in the new family structure, each member of the family needs a period of adaptation.
On the other hand, you should not take full responsibility for what is happening. Do not be overwhelmed and take care of yourself, because there may be situations of anguish or discomfort that affect your well-being. And keep in mind that you are not obligated to feel love for them from the beginning.
I advise you that instead of establishing an uncomfortable climate with your partner's children, put yourself in their place so that you can understand why what they are going through since they may feel misunderstood, rejected or not knowing what role they have in this new situation family. In most cases, children's actions show us that they need to be understood, heard and who require help to feel safe again since their family structure has been broken. If you need more guidance, we advise you to read the following article to solve family problems.
Tips for rebuilt families.
We are aware that establishing a relationship with your partner's children is necessary but requires a lot of time and patience.
In addition, to solve any type of conflict, we must bear in mind that in personal relationships they are something of two and that the bond should be worked on by both, both on your part and on the part of your children partner. In some cases, professional guidance is necessary, either because the children have not adjusted well or because one or both members of the couple need help.
Couple relationshipsWith or without children, they require will and effort. ¡Take it easy and a lot of humor!
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to How to treat my partner's children, we recommend that you enter our category of Family problems.
