Some people come to a point in their life when they draw the conclusion that they want to stop suffering from stories in which they give a lot and receive little in return. Or, also, stories that seem to repeat a similar pattern. It is then when the person arises to be cold in love.
This message, in reality, can also be expressed with the idea of taking a greater emotional distance in falling in love so as not to confuse it with love. ¿How to be a cold person in love? In Psychology-Online, we give you the keys to protect your heart. However, do not confuse this idea with not feeling.
One of the situations in which many people conclude that they want to be cold and calculating in love is when they wish to forget a person and believe that this is the best way to achieve it. How to fulfill this purpose?
1. Make your commitment with this attitude
If this is really your wish, then reflect on the reasons why you want to adopt this attitude and be consistent in practice with this purpose. For example, if the other person writes you a message, don't reply.
2. Be clear about the objective
If you adopt this cold attitude As a mechanism of indifference, it is important that you keep in mind that the reason for this action is not to awaken the interest of that person but to forget him permanently. That is, it is not a seduction strategy but a necessary process of forgetting.
3. Eliminate memories
For example, you can tear up the photos you keep of that person. Do the same with their whatsapp messages or any detail that has sentimental value to you. When you erase these memories, you do not immediately erase that person's presence from your mind. However, you have taken an important step by eliminate emotional attachment.
4. Appreciate your loneliness
And find in it a refuge in which to feel good and be calm. This loneliness can be a healthy distance to think about you and what you want to do. However, don't take loneliness as a literal message. This is a good time to let yourself be accompanied by the people who love you. They can be a very important foothold when you have the desire to reconnect with your ex. For example, you can phone a friend instead of contacting him.
This is another of the situations in which it is convenient to know how to be a cold person in love. In this case, to make a firm decision decision to break up that it does not derive, with the passage of time, in a new reconciliation. What to do when you are immersed in a story that follows the scheme "neither with you nor without you"?
- Analyze the trajectory prior to this relationship. How many chances have you given that person? And what has always been the result? What has happened before is what will happen again now if you act in the same way again. Remember that if you want to obtain different results, you also have to take different actions.
- Ask for psychological help. One of the risks of this type of relationship is the psychological hook that a person experiences when he believes that her happiness depends on being with her ex. Psychological support can give you the strength not to call your ex at the initial nostalgia for the breakup.
- Speak clearly with your ex and express your intention to forget him for good. It is time to tell him that this relationship has ended without uttering any message that could generate some kind of confusion about the future between the two.
- Assume that you don't want to suffer from a relationship that is tormenting again. Feel inner peace as a way to increase your self love and nurture self-esteem.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
