We know that in all relationships there are anger and arguments, but what happens when this becomes a constant and we get angry about everything with that person? What does this state of constant anger mean and that lasts over time? Behind this feeling, there are many causes that can be found and it is essential to identify them in order to be able to solve this problem and prevent anger, irritability and rage from ending up ruining our relationship. The most common thing is that if you always get angry with your boyfriend, there is a problem in the relationship that you must attend to, although it is also You may need to focus on yourself and find out if this attitude is related to your personal development or another area of your life personal. Keep reading this Psychology-Online article to find the answer to the question of "Why am I angry about everything with my boyfriend."
Unresolved issues of the past
On many occasions, the fact get so mad at the partner is related to some grudge from the past that was not expressed at the time or that if it was talk, she has not been able to forgive her and, at present, it comes out in the form of anger or arguments with the partner. This is a common situation among couples who have suffered a crisis due to
The relationship doesn't work
If you are always angry with your partner, it is important that analyze your feelings towards that person and values if you have a healthy relationship that you want to continue living. There are times when routine or monotony They take their toll on the couple and cause numerous arguments between them. At other times, feelings towards the partner change and you may begin to realize that they are not the person with whom you want to continue sharing your life, and until it is time to accept this and take the step of ending the relationship, it is possible that everything the other person does upset, irritate and anger you easily.
If, on the other hand, your permanent anger is due to a toxic relationship in which you are not happy, but do not know how to take the step of ending it, we advise you to consult the advice in the article how to get out of a toxic relationship as a couple.
You both have a dominant character
There are couples that are made up of two people with a very dominant character and this gradually creates a kind of "competition" between them for everything. This is a situation that can cause anger and numerous arguments between the couple, since both they want to be right in everything. Although in some cases, this may be due to some kind of personal insecurity, in others it may be a consequence of having a big ego and an inflated self-esteem.
Idealization of the couple
In many people it is common that when they fall in love they idealize the other person to the point that they do not fall in love with the person but with a projection of it. In order to admire her, they think of impossible realities about the couple and create false expectations. With the passage of time, they realize what he really is like, what his attitudes are to different situations and what are his virtues but also his defects. That's when disappointment and frustration appearBecause when seeing that that person is not what was expected, irritation begins, constant anger and arguments with the other for everything he says or does.
Personal frustration
Another cause that can answer your question about why I get angry about everything with my boyfriend is that you do not feel satisfied with some aspect of your life and you discharge these frustrations with anger towards the person you have the most close. In this case, it is not really an anger with the partner but with ourselves for not having been able to achieve our goals or not having been able to do things the way we wanted. If you have problems at work, with friends, with family, or feel dissatisfied with your current life, it is important that you realize that this is the cause of constant anger with your partner and that you work on yourself to be able to solve the situation. In the following article, we show how to channel frustration.
Once you know the possible causes why you may get angry about everything with your boyfriend, we are going to give you a series of simple tips so that you can resolve this situation and so that you can enjoy your relationship as before, if you feel that you want to continue sharing your day-to-day with him. Keep in mind that what determines a good relationship is not the number of times that both get angry or discuss, but the ability of the two to solve them and the time you need to overcome and recover emotionally.
- Analyze yourself and know yourself: First of all, it is important that you are aware of your ongoing annoyances and that you know how to identify the causes of them. Only then can you find the right solution and act accordingly. It is also essential that you are able to recognize your mistakes and not focus or point only to those of your partner. Evaluate if you want to continue with the relationship and if so, think that being always angry with him will not let you advance or enjoy a prosperous and lasting relationship.
- Be aware of which situations are causing you anger or in what contexts do you usually get angry with your partner. In this way, you can prevent many of the annoyances from now on, since you can anticipate them and try to find a solution before becoming excessively irritated.
- If the ongoing anger has to do with current problems in the relationship or conflicts from the past that you feel that they have been left unresolved, it is essential that you find the right time to talk to your boyfriend Y express how you feel. Avoid adopting a defensive attitude and tell him calmly what is worrying you, between the two of you you can find the solution to the problem and overcome it.
- Work your thoughts: To prevent anger with your boyfriend from escalating and leading to an unpleasant argument between the two of you, try to put negative thoughts such as "no I bear it "," I am always right "," He does not understand anything ", etc., this will only feed back your anger and will not allow you to calm down or act calmly.
- Accept your partner as he is: For a relationship to work, it is essential to accept the other as they are and not try to change them or wait for them to become a person they are not. You must learn to love your partner with their strengths and weaknesses and accept that each of you may have different points of view or opinions. If, finally, it turns out that you are not compatible and you feel that nothing can improve the situation, it will be time to take the step and understand that he is not the right person for you.
- Breathe and relax: If you are very angry with your boyfriend, it is best to try to calm down at that moment and breathe deeply. Postpone the time to talk to him to when you feel that you are calmer and you can tell him what is happening with you calmly. Otherwise, anger will take center stage and you will start an uncomfortable and unpleasant discussion that can further fracture your relationship.
The continuous anger between a couple can lead to arguing all the time and this, without It will undoubtedly cause significant fractures in the relationship and even, in many cases, lead to a breaking off.
If after putting into practice all the tips that we have indicated to know how to act if you are always angry with your partner, no you manage to remedy the situation and feelings of anger, anger, sadness, etc., continue to invade you, it is convenient that you seek help professional. The psychological therapy can help you identify the cause of that permanent state of anger with your boyfriend and give you the guidelines you need to move on and get back to being good with yourself and with your partner.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
