Breaking up with a partner is never an easy task, either because we have become accustomed to the routine that being with that person provides us, because it has become become our comfort zone, or because although we no longer want to continue sharing our lives with him or her, we still have affection and esteem for him or her. This difficulty increases when we are sharing our day to day with that person.
There are many other decisions that must be taken into account in situations of rupture, including finding the best way to deal with the situation or even the doubt of wanting to maintain said relationship for a longer time despite the fact that we supposedly had the decision very clear. For this reason, in the following Psychology-Online article we offer you 10 tips on how to leave your partner living together.
Index
- Take the decision
- Do not avoid facing the problem
- let him know
- Express yourself assertively
- Lean on your closest environment
- Get ready for their reaction
- There are still many other decisions to be made
- Continue living together once you have broken up
- new life project
- Communicate to family and friends
Take the decision.
It is important that before "dropping the bomb" you can think about the decision you are going to make and be clear that it really is what you want, both for you and for the other person. With this we will avoid possible swings that generate greater discomfort. Also, this will be the beginning of many other complex decisions.
Do not avoid facing the problem.
Once you are completely sure of your decision, it is important that you take action and get ready to face the problem with determination (with things clear), even with the fear of uncertainty and many other emotions that you may be experiencing at that moment.
Communicate it.
There is no perfect time to communicate news like this, so if you are clear that you want to leave your partner, simply sit down with him or her and let them know.
It is important that, once you have made the decision to leave your partner, you muster up the courage to be able to talk about calm way, so that you can express everything you feel with clarity and sincerity to be able to close this stage.
Express yourself assertively.
If you have already made the decision, it is because you are clear, or at least as clear as possible, that there is nothing to fix or change so that the relationship can be maintained, either because one of the parties does not want it or because everything has already been tried before and you believe that it is no longer worth continuing trying it.
In either case, this It is not a time to recriminate the other person or make reproaches about what could have been and was not. On the contrary, when you break up with someone, it is best that you use a assertive communication, focusing the message and on what you think, feel or perceive, without blaming the other person for what they may have done or failed to do.
Lean on your closest environment.
It is important that in painful or complicated situations you can feel accompanied and supported by the people you care aboutlike friends or family. Likewise, also you can talk to a psychologist to accompany you in the process if you consider it necessary.
Prepare for his reaction.
When we communicate to our partner that we want to leave the relationship, for whatever reason, we must prepare for the different scenarios that they can occur. He may try in every possible way to keep the relationship going, or we may find that he or she also agrees with our decision and even "we have done them a favor" by saying it first. We can also find ourselves crying, anger, rage, disbelief or even joy.
There are still many other decisions to be made.
In the case of not having children in common, this would give us to write another article, break a relationship when you are living together involves many other decisions, such as reaching an agreement on who gets what. This can include furniture, clothing, property, pets, money, investments, etc.
Continue living together once you have broken up.
When you break up with your partner and are living together, you will most likely have to go through a period of time where you are still living together after breaking up. This can be quite a difficult stage, so it is important that you prepare in advance to get through it. you probably need set some limits and rules while this situation lasts.
New life project.
It doesn't matter how long you've been thinking about this decision, nor how long you've been with your partner. Surely you had plans for the future together and a life project as a couple and, unless this is the main reason for the breakup, Breaking involves making a new approach to your life project, since that person will stop sharing their path with yours.
There is an important period of reflection that will be important for you to think deeply and slowly about how to direct your life from now on and create a new life project. This is something that you can discover over time.
Communicate it to family and friends.
This is advice that is often not taken into account in couple breakups. Nevertheless, the bond we had with our partner was not the only one that had been formed, since your boyfriend / girlfriend could also have established a relationship (more or less intimate) with family and friends, and it is even possible that you shared friendships.
When breaking up the relationship, it is important to keep in mind that you will most likely never have any more. type of relationship with their relatives and many of their friends, since they will have sided with one of the parts. In some cases, family and friends may continue to have a relationship with both, however, it is not usual.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to How to leave your partner living together, we recommend that you enter our category of Feelings.
Bibliography
- Apolinar, S., April 21, 2017. If you live with your partner and plan to end the relationship, you need to take these things into account. Univision. Recovered from: If you live with your partner and plan to end the relationship, you need to take these things into account | Couples Lifestyle | Univision
- Garcia, F., 2013. Couple breakup, coping and psychological well-being in young adults. Ajayu., 42-60.
- Mora, v. (without date). End a relationship if you still live together - Five keys. Vidalia Mora Digital Project Manager. Recovered from: End a relationship if you still live together-Five keys | Vidalia Mora
